Judge-Your-Neighbor Worksheet

Judge your neighbor • Write it down • Ask four questions • Turn it around

Think of a recurring stressful situation, a situation that is reliably stressful even though it may have happened only once and recurs only in your mind. As you answer each of the questions below, allow yourself to mentally revisit the time and place of the stressful occurrence. Use short, simple sentences.

Example: I am angry with Paul because he doesn’t listen to me.
Example: I want Paul to see that he is wrong. I want him to stop lying to me. I want him to see that he is killing himself.
Example: Paul should take a deep breath. He should calm down. He should see that his behavior frightens me. He should know that being right is not worth another heart attack.
Example: I need Paul to hear me when I talk to him. I need him to take care of himself. I need him to admit that I am right.
Example: Paul is unfair, arrogant, loud, dishonest, way out of line, and unconscious.
Example: I don’t ever want Paul to lie to me again. I don’t ever want to see him ruining his health again.
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